Friendly But Not Friends

I’ve had questions (several actually, but could not use them all) at my friendship column at TheHerTake with Nina Badzin HerStories Project about how to turn an acquaintanceship into a friendship. Today’s question asks the exact opposite, which is how to stay friendly but avoid becoming actual friends (without causing damage to the “friendliness.”) Make sense? It does to me, but of course I love the minutia of relationships in all their forms.

I tried to do the dilemma justice, but as always I know (or at least I’m guessing) that the people asking for my advice like the excellent comments from readers as well. Please read the question and chime in with your two cents. Thank you!

If you’d like to ask me an anonymous question, that form is here.

And I keep a list of all the friendship dilemmas I’ve answered here

Have a good week everyone! 


People of The Book


I’m guessing that the average high school senior wants a gift card for a graduation present, or even better, cash. I remember being 18 and appreciating either of those options as well as any item emblazoned with my college’s name, like a pair of mesh shorts. (This was 1995!) I also liked gifts with my…

Shallow Friends

This week’s question at The HerStories Project comes from a woman who feels that despite having many acquaintances and social activities, she has no close friendships. She describes her friendships as shallow (the relationships, not the people). I tried to help with some practical advice, but I also felt that her question highlighted some major…

Do Listen Read: Early May

Do listen read

I look forward to writing these Do Listen Read posts so much! It’s been a while, and I’ve been collecting so enjoy. DO – Smitten Kitchen has been on a roll lately. I made her crispy broccoli with lemon and garlic. – I also made her newest chocolate chip cookie recipe. (Her old one has been a…

Why I Love Mahj-Jongg

mahj-jongg Nina Badzin

I’ve been meaning to write about why I love my Mahj-jongg group for several years. Well, this is finally the week! Do you play mahj-jongg or any other game with a group of friends? Do I sound like I’m 92? Come to to why I love my mahj-jongg group, and why I think groups…

Do Friends and Family Read Your Work?


Today’s question at The HerStories Project is from a writer and blogger wondering how to handle a close friend who is dismissive of her work. It may seem like this question and answer is specific to one profession, but it’s really for all people who feel that a close friend or family member is disinterested…

False Sense of Control

The Mid Nina Badzin

I’m up on The Mid with a piece about how I used to obsess over decisions like what stroller to get, what to pick out for crib bedding, and other very obviously unimportant matters. Was it all really about strollers or crib bedding? Of course not. Those obsessions were an exercise in a false sense of CONTROL….

How I Learned to Freewrite Again

Jena Schwartz class

Before I joined one of Jena Schwartz’s 10-day free writing groups in March, I could not remember the last time I sat down to write with no intention of eventually getting those words into a publishable form. I’m efficient that way, which has its benefits, but in the area of creativity, that push to GO GO GO has…