The Joy of Driving Long Distance Alone

I’ve discovered the joy of driving long distance alone, which is unexpected since I complain about any drive within Minneapolis that takes longer than 20 minutes. I’m not saying I’d want to drive 14 hours by myself, but the seven hours from Minneapolis to Chicago is the perfect road trip for someone who craves time without someone asking her for something. The seven hours back to Minneapolis a few days later is the bonus to think about the things you didn’t cover on the initial trip.

When I was in college, the drive from my parents’ house in Chicago to my campus in St. Louis was only five hours, and that was my first experience with the joy of driving alone. My dad drove with me the first few times then flew back to Chicago, but when he realized I could handle the trip without him he let me loose on the highway. Once in a while a friend would ask for a ride to St. Louis or a ride back to Chicago and I would panic about having enough to talk about. I did that drive many times a year during college with some Broadway show in the background (RENT!) or one of my favorite mixes on repeat. Even then I loved having a slice of time when my only responsibility was to get from point A to point B safely. The car is also the only place where I can sing unabashedly!

I lived in Minneapolis for 16 years before I drove to Chicago by myself, but now that I’ve realized how much I savor that time, I’ve done it twice in six months, and I can’t wait to do it again.

My most recent solo road trip was last weekend when I drove to Chicago for my cousin’s son’s bar mitzvah.

At the bar mitzvah with my parents.

Most people I told thought I was crazy not to fly for a weekend trip, and I understand that point of view. Spending seven hours of Friday and another seven of Sunday behind the wheel might seem like a colossal waste of time. For me, the hassle of the airport combined with the hassle of renting a car at O’Hare wasn’t worth the three to four hours I’d save by flying. I’d rather see the rolling, impressive farmland of Wisconsin than the crammed and crabby bodies at the airport. Also, I’d enjoyed my solo road trip six months earlier and was eager to do it again.

When you have four kids and a spouse, seven hours alone while driving is a form of meditation. I allowed myself a few long phone calls with friends, but for the most part I alternated between an audiobook (Theft By Finding by David Sedaris), my favorite podcasts (#AmWriting, Happier, and Double X for this trip), and a shuffling of my completely random iTunes collection. Seven hours was almost not enough time. When I pulled into my parents’ driveway, I felt I could have used another hour to tie up all the thoughts stirring in my mind. I vowed to make less phone calls on the way back to Minneapolis and skip the podcasts, and sure enough, by the time I arrived home I’d come up with an idea for a novel. It may amount to nothing, but I’m enjoying playing with the idea for now, an idea that wouldn’t have come to me without that uninterrupted time on the road.

Anyone else love to drive long distance? What is the most amount of time you’ve spent alone on the road? 


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Nina Badzin hosts the podcast Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship. She's been writing about friendship since 2014, co-leads the writing groups at ModernWell in Minneapolis, and reviews 30+ books a year on her website.

19 Responses

  1. I’m with you. I love solo road trips. A few years ago I drove across the country with my daughter (she had a job in San Francisco), and I drove home to Maine by myself. I took about 6 days and visited friends along the way. I loved it. Exciting you thought of a novel idea; the thinking was one of my favorite parts, too.
    Julia Munroe Martin recently posted..A Final Good-byeMy Profile

    1. You get it….yes you do!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Another experience awaits you, Wait until you experience the pleasure of traveling to wherever you want and spend your time however you wish on your own. Whatever happens during your travels the experience is all yours. As you know, doing so is the my ideal way to go.

      1. The drive I get! As for traveling alone . . . I wonder if I’d ever leave the hotel. I don’t like making arrangements, etc. The Chicago trips work well for me because it’s all so easy and familiar. But maybe one day I will come around on that.

  2. The most amount of time I have spent alone in the car was almost five hours when I lived in a different city than my hometown and would drive back and forth. I remember dreading the drives at the time (this was before podcasts), but at this stage in my life, I think I would give anything for that quiet time!
    Caryn recently posted..Dear NKOTB: Thanks for Last NightMy Profile

  3. I also love long distance driving ALONE! I often take a short 4 hour trip to visit my sister and people want to come to “keep me company” on the drive. I prefer to crank up the radio or CD player and sing at the top of my lungs, or do some reflective thinking. When taking the longer 16 hour road trip to visit our daughter, my husband will soundly sleep when I take the wheel – same as being alone!

  4. I hear you! I regularly make a long drive by myself (well, Reggie is with me) from NYC to Tennessee, where my parents live. It’s about 15 hours each way. I never thought I’d like driving that far by myself, but it’s restorative. After the crowded, noisy city, it’s often a relief to be in a quiet car by myself. And the scenery of the Blue Ridge Mountains is lovely.
    Jackie Cangro recently posted..7 Books I Want to Read AgainMy Profile

  5. I admire you for being able to do this, Nina. I have no issues being alone and savor those times, actually. What I can’t do is drive long distances, especially to unfamiliar places and highways. I never really drove when I lived in the Philippines (save for driving school) and when I migrated here to the U.S.,I’ve always been afraid of highways and going to unfamiliar places in spite of having a GPS, google maps, yahoo maps, etc.. Driving causes me much stress to be honest. So yeah, kudos to you!

  6. I like driving alone, listening to Broadway soundtracks and audio books. Unfortunately, my back makes long drives less enjoyable than they used to be!

  7. I think you’re amazing, Nina. I can’t think of anything worse than driving alone for so long – who would I talk to? 🙂

    I think the longest stretch of driving I’ve ever done by myself is 1 hour 30 minutes, and that was after a flight because there is then no other way to get to a client. Gorgeous scenery but about all I could do before getting bored (and I listened to a podcast).

  8. I enjoy driving alone. It is a great way to listen to my favorite music or a podcast I adore. It’s also a chance to be alone with my thoughts for a continuous period of time and allows for the possibility of a story or essay idea to emerge.

  9. I think I’m more like you. If I can be by myself for several hours, and enjoy some music along the way – while saving $$$ – I’m in.
    My parents live four hours away and I often do that drive in one weekend. That’s usually 8-10 hours in all when you factor in kids and stops. I do it solo like it’s nothing. When Cassidy comes with and he drives, he needs to have a drink right when we get there and get my parent’s sympathy!
    I’m like, “Hello, I do this all the time! Wuss.”
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  10. Late again!But always so glad to stop by. Oh, sounds heavenly. Yes, Yes, Yes. LOVE to drive by myself. I could go and go and go. After my now husband and I were dating for a year, he suddenly had to move 10 hours away for work. For several months, until he proposed and I joined him, I drove that distance twice a month and listened to books on tape the whole way. The time flew by and I loved every minute of it. I’d probably love it even more these days now that I rarely get time to myself. Not in the cards in any foreseeable future though:-( Fun to see the pic of you and your mom and dad.

  11. Me too! Love driving alone. I started making the trip to and from Los Angeles from Northern California–6-7 hours–in college, and I still love driving that alone. Just did it for a writing conference in April. I also like listening to audiobooks and writing podcasts when I drive. (Have you ever tried David Naimon’s Between the Covers, Nina? It’s my favorite because he’s a great interviewer and goes deep into craft. The most recent episode is a fabulous interview with Dani Shapiro.) I, ahem, like to follow those writer interviews with interviews with myself about my writing, spoken aloud. Haha! It actually helps me figure out my process and what I’m doing with my writing. Talking to myself–favorite part of driving alone! <3
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  12. I can really relate to this. I realized how much I love driving alone when we made the cross-country drive from San Diego to Indiana. Those long days, driving alone with my podcasts and music were so therapeutic. Now I look forward to any long solo trips I can take.

  13. Love this! Road trips rock — so good for fictional inspiration. Glad you have some ideas germinating, Nina.

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Hi, I'm Nina

HI, I’M NINA BADZIN. I’m a writer fascinated by the dynamics of friendship, and I’ve been answering anonymous advice questions on the topic since 2014. I now also answer them on my podcast, Dear Nina! I’m a creative writing instructor at ModernWell in Minneapolis, a freelance writer and editor, and an avid reader who reviews 50 books a year. Welcome to my site! 

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Hi, I'm Nina

DEAR NINA: Conversations About Friendship is a podcast and newsletter about the ups and downs of adult friendship. I’m the host, Nina Badzin, a Minneapolis-based writer who accepted a position as a friendship advice columnist in 2014 and never stopped. DEAR NINA, the podcast, started in 2021, and has been referenced in The Wall Street JournalThe Washington PostTime Magazine, The GuardianThe Chicago TribuneThe Minneapolis Star Tribune, and elsewhere

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