Quiet Quitting a Friendship

Withdrawing from friends or ending friendships

Let’s say you know that a friendship has run its course, but the friend has done nothing wrong. How do we go about distancing from a friend or ending a friendship? How do we process it when we feel a friend withdrawing? How do we negotiate conflict or transitions that are going to come up in many friendships?

“Quiet quitting” is the latest term for withdrawing from a friendship, phasing out, or disengaging completely. In this episode with the insightful Dr. Miriam Kirmayer, a clinical psychologist in Montreal who specializes in friendship, we discuss why someone might choose the strategy of “quiet quitting” for fading away from a friend.


 

Meet Dr. Miriam Kirmayer:

Dr. Miriam Kirmayer is a clinical psychologist, leading friendship expert, and one of the most influential speakers on human connection and social support. Find free friendship resources on her site and follow her on Instagram and LinkedIn.


 

FIND EPISODE #109 ON APPLE PODCASTS, SPOTIFY, YOUTUBE, OR ANYWHERE YOU LISTEN TO PODCASTS!  

 


We discussed:

  • Most people have been on both sides of the “quiet quitting” equation
  • How quiet quitting differs from ghosting
  • When quiet quitting is a good strategy and when it is not
  • Why we are both strongly against using “quiet quitting” to test a friend
  • Friends cannot read our minds!
  • The struggle many people have to initiate plans, but respecting friends’ strengths (and not expecting friends to do things exactly the way we do them)
  • Quiet quitting has its place, but it can also be a sign of an inability to have a vulnerable or direct conversation because of a lack of practice or opportunity to do so.
  • Downgrades in friendships vs. dissolutions
  • How to avoid burning a bridge with friends (or old friends)
  • “Quiet quitting works until it doesn’t.” You might have to be more direct at some point. We discussed some kind ways to do so.

All transcripts are available on the main Buzzsprout “Dear Nina” site. Click on any episode and find the transcript tab.

 


Let’s connect over all things friendship! 

 

If you like what you’re hearing,  please tell a friend!
Also, if you can 
rate and/or leave a review on Apple Podcasts, I’d be so grateful.

 

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Nina Badzin hosts the podcast Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship. She's been writing about friendship since 2014, co-leads the writing groups at ModernWell in Minneapolis, and reviews 30+ books a year on her website.

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Hi, I'm Nina

HI, I’M NINA BADZIN. I’m a writer fascinated by the dynamics of friendship, and I’ve been answering anonymous advice questions on the topic since 2014. I now also answer them on my podcast, Dear Nina! I’m a creative writing instructor at ModernWell in Minneapolis, a freelance writer and editor, and an avid reader who reviews 50 books a year. Welcome to my site! 

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Hi, I'm Nina

DEAR NINA: Conversations About Friendship is a podcast and newsletter about the ups and downs of adult friendship. I’m the host, Nina Badzin, a Minneapolis-based writer who accepted a position as a friendship advice columnist in 2014 and never stopped. DEAR NINA, the podcast, started in 2021, and has been referenced in The Wall Street JournalThe Washington PostTime Magazine, The GuardianThe Chicago TribuneThe Minneapolis Star Tribune, and elsewhere

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