The Twitter Thanking Crisis

YOU’VE LANDED ON PART IV OF MY TWITTER TIPS.

SEE A LIST OF PREVIOUS TWITTER POSTS.

I love Twitter. And I’m big on proper manners. That said, I am focusing my fourth Twitter tips post on the constant thanking of people on Twitter. In my opinion, our good manners have gone too far, and we all suffer for it.

Not sure what I’m talking about? When I log onto Twitter lately, this is what I see:

Thanks to @____, @_____, @______ for the follows!

Grateful for RTs from @ ______, @______, @_______!

Hugs for blog visits and comments @_____, @_____, @______!

Looks like a whole lot of nothing, doesn’t it? Call me a cynic, but seeing those messages as regular tweets rather than @replies where your entire following wouldn’t have to see them strikes me as suspiciously self-serving. (If you don’t know the difference between a regular tweet and an @reply, I explain it here.) If the goal of your tweet is to thank the people you’re listing, then why do ALL of your followers need to see it? Written as I’ve shown above, I can’t help but “hear” the following rather than thanks: Read my blog! RT me! Congratulate me! Me, Me, Me.

Expressing our gratitude as @replies helps our crisis a bit, but we’re still spending tremendous amounts of time thanking people and reading about other people getting thanked, which gets at the deeper issue. How much thanking is necessary on Twitter in the first place? Where is the line between appreciation and absolute overkill? Can we come to an agreement on how to demonstrate our gratitude?

LET’S ANALYZE EACH AREA OF CONCERN:

Thanking New Twitter Followers: This one is easy. If you follow the person back, that’s an inherent “thank you.” If you don’t follow the person back, I don’t think writing “thanks for the follow @_____” does much to compensate. Follow back (if you want to) OR leave well enough alone. Side note: NO MATTER WHAT, do NOT write direct messages thanking people for the follow. A private message saying: “Thanks for the follow. Check out my [novel, blog, tweets]” is an excellent example of disingenuous gratitude. When you truly interact with people on Twitter through their tweets, they WILL likely check out your tweets, blog, etc.

Thanking for ReTweets: I propose this: If you and other tweeters regularly RT each other, then perhaps you can save yourselves some time and NOT thank each other on top of it all. The back and forth RTing, no matter how intermittent, serves as a more useful, “thank you” than a “thank you” tweet. As for thanking in general for RTs, I urge people to wait until the end of the day or the next day, then write one or two tweets (as an @reply) listing those thank yous.

Thanking people for congratulating you, for coming to your event, for helping to promote you in any way: Reread last sentence of the RT category. That advice applies here too.

Thanking people for commenting on your blog? That’s silly. Just visit that person’s blog. Done.

So group, what do you think? Am I the only one who’s tired of their Twitter feed looking like gobbly-gook? Gratitude is good. What I’m seeing on Twitter these days is too much of a good thing. And it’s really annoying.

With that, I thank you for reading this lengthy post. And for RTing it. 

Badzin Twitter Thanking Crisis

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Nina Badzin hosts the podcast Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship. She's been writing about friendship since 2014, co-leads the writing groups at ModernWell in Minneapolis, and reviews 30+ books a year on her website.

Latest posts by Nina Badzin (see all)

179 Responses

  1. I’m fairly new to twitter, but you are so right! Thanks for the post, and I really hope a lot of people read this. They really need to! The things you mentioned above are annoying to say the least.

    1. I’ll probably be saying this a lot today . . . there are no real “rules” for how to use Twitter. The issues I discuss here are a matter of what I’ve seen over a year. Some people do the thank yous as @replies, some as regular tweets. I can’t help but notice how annoying they get as regular tweets, especially when you’re following a lot of people. But it’s not like anyone has broken a rule!

  2. Thank you, thank you, for this Nina! As someone who is still getting myself sorted-out on Twitter, I was thinking all this abundant thanking was a step above obnoxious. But still, as an unpracticed Tweeter myself I also wondered if maybe this is just the norm and I needed to get with the flow of things. So glad to have the inside line on this, since I really truly don’t want to be “one of THOSE people!” LOL

    1. Hi! So, you’re right, I think it IS the norm. And I want it to stop!!! I’m hoping this will spread and make Twitter more interesting to read for all of us!

  3. But Nina, don’t you remember? The internet is all about me, me, me!!! 😛

    On a more serious note, I agree, especially with the thanksgiving for visiting/commenting on a blog post. Even at a relatively modest 300+ following, my feed is clogged like the 1st floor toilet of a frat house – I can’t imagine what it’s like for those with 1000+ following.

    But personally, more than the “Thanks! RT @Tweep: Go read @Tweep2’s blog! IT”S WINNING!!!!” I find the “:) RT @Tweep: Go read @Tweep2’s blog! IT”S WINNING!!!!” more egregious. At least in the 1st case, the person is giving a cursory thank you, the second tweet reads like: *happy sigh* Yup. I am that awesome!

  4. Hi Nina,

    Whenever I get a new follow I try to check out the website that they have and READ some of their posts. If I find one I truly find interesting, I post it. If someone leaves a comment on my blog, I do write back a thanks with a LINK to something I found interesting or helpful to theirs. I try to put links on all my thank yous, RT’s or #FF or #WW. This helps people check out what this person is all about. I try not to #WW or #FF that much because if you truly like what a person tweets, you’ll be checking out their timeline and who they follow anyway. Common interests, common ground.

    I think most people are just trying to be polite, but I am more likely to check out Tweets with links to blogs, articles or pictures than I am to scan through someone’s #FF list. I have followed two people, maybe, from a big #FF list. I go with genuine gratitude that has taken the time to look at a person’s website or work. That’s what it’s all about, right? Connecting in meaningful way, 140 words or less. Being insightful and witty is helpful, but genuine always shines through. Great post, you can thank me later. 😉

    1. Jen–I’m not just saying this, your twitter profile page could read as an example of how to Tweet. You are always graceful and genuinely informative, interesting, and thankful in the best way. I’ve often followed your links to interesting posts! And you’re so sweet and charming–all in 140 characters. People can learn from you!!!!

  5. Had to laugh at this: “In my opinion, our good manners have gone too far, and we all suffer for it.” 🙂 !

    I agree with a lot of this — even thanking with an @reply can clog streams because often your followers are following a lot of the same people, so will see the conversations going on. I sometimes will thank people with direct messages for this reason. Still, there are some tweeters who are so kind and sincere –you just gotta love them for their twitter hug fests.

    Good things to think about, Nina.

  6. I try to keep the back and forth thanking to a minimum (as well as the RTs and #FF and the other points you mention). When I do thank someone for an RT, it might be because it’s someone I haven’t interacted with before, and I want them to know that I noticed. But usually, even just starting an actual conversation is a better idea. It’s also not possible to thank every single follower, RTer, etc., especially after you’ve been on Twitter a while and have a substantial amount of followers. The best you can do is try to reply when someone mentions you directly, and RT the tweets you’re genuinely interested in.

    If I lose a follower because I haven’t thanked them for an RT, then it makes me question if they’re on Twitter for the right reasons. Twitter isn’t always about equal reciprocation because someone I follow might not necessarily be interested in following me back. I’d rather they follow because they want to, not out of obligation.

    Great points, Nina!

  7. Great post, Nina! As you know, I suffered from not only thinking that the incessant thanking was “protocol” (in fact, I believe I read it in a Twitter how-to book), but ALSO from what Natalia mentions above: the feeling of a need to reciprocate on EVERY little thing on Twitter. I’m glad to see this topic being discussed & I hope your tips spread like wildfire (you should link to this post from your upcoming WU post). Agree w/ all your points that these thanks clog up the stream. And my apologies for being a hard-core abuser in that matter up until a few weeks ago :-(.

    1. Melissa,

      I think there are no rules on this stuff, but I agree that it’s great to get the conversation started. I hope the tips spread too! And thanks for your help in brainstorming this post. I appreciate the time you put in to help me!! Natalia’s point was so crucial . . . if we could all give ourselves a break on the need to be so tit for tat, I think Twitter would be easier and more enjoyable for all of us!

  8. I think part of this comes from the reciprocal nature of Twitter. People publicly thank those who retweet and mention them in order to return the favor of promotion. But I agree with your post, all of this over thanking leads to noise and makes it more work to see the good stuff on Twitter.

    1. I think this thinking adds to the problem though. True reciprocity for an RT or any kind of favor on Twitter is not a “thank you.” It would be promoting the person back whether via a link to their blog or some other personal tweet about THAT person, not as a thank you, which still goes back to your post, book, or whatever. I’m not suggesting every RT must be reciprocated with an RT, but we should all stop thinking that a “thank you” tweet helps to promote anyone. I know . . . Twitter has made me grouchy. 😉

  9. I LOVE THIS POST!

    I have been guilty of all of these abuses, not because I found most of them valuable or necessary but because I thought they were MANDATORY.

    (I also engaged in the auto DM when I first came to Twitter because I saw other people doing it and assumed I was supposed to…)

    I sometimes RT someone’s tweet of one of my posts to increase the exposure without it always being my own tweet…but I suppose overdoing it is annoying and it is definitely self-serving, I’ll admit.

    I REALLY don’t like the group #WW’s and #FF’s that appear to be automatic and not meaningful. I have felt obligated to thank (and the worst is when you don’t wish to reciprocate) but I will now think twice.

    I tweeted this post and hope everyone takes heed.
    No need to thank me 😉

    1. Hey Julie–there are no real rules . . . I’m coming at all of this after being on Twitter for a bit over a year and just seeing what seems to work and what doesn’t. I think RTing someone’s tweet about your post is totally fine, especially when the person described your post in a funny or interesting way. It’s not something I’d do all the time, but frankly, I find it a more upfront honest approach than some of the other thank yous I see out there.

      I don’t think it’s necessary to reciprocate WWs/FFs nor do I think it’s necessary to thank people every time–ESPECIALLY for those automated ones.

  10. Like Julie, I thought some of this was required, and here I’ve been feeling guilty not doing it. So thanks for relieving the guilt burden.

    Kristen Lamb also has a post today about #FF and #WW abuse. I’ve never done it because those long lists don’t do anything for me. She agrees that #FF should be genuine, and suggests you include only one @ address and give some reason to follow.

    The only thing I do is thank for RTs–not everybody, but if they’ve never RT’d me before, or they give a recommendation “This is brilliant: check out @annerallen’s blog….” I thank.

    I’m faced with a whole bunch of lovely RTs today, but maybe I’ll save my thanks and do them all at the end of the day. But that’s a lot of work, since you have to copy and paste each one. Twitter makes it much easier to thank individuals.

    But I agree that those thanks for follows are redundant.

    1. I agree that thanking someone new for an RT or for an unusually kind one is a good idea. I do that as well. You really don’t have to acknowledge every RT (in my opinion). Let’s decide right here and now that you and I can skip the thank yous for each other as we both RT each other from time to time and comment on each others’ posts often. 😉

  11. Almost two years ago my lovely and talented daughter began helping me to set up a blog. It took a while before I got the hang of it and began to find other bloggers. “Comment on other blogs, ma.” Okay, so I learned the ins and outs … learned how to put in photographs and video in the text of the blog.

    Then she said, “Mom, you should also have a ‘twitter’ account.”

    I wrote to a good blogger friend, Christi Corbett and she said, “I just got into that this week. It’s great.”

    Okay Nina … this is the skinny. I don’t know what to do with it, have not given it enough time to learn about hash marks or how to negotiate around to find people of liken-types and so on. For a long time all it was for me was a place to click and leave a “tweet” about my posts. Using one form of social media to shout out the other didn’t sound right.

    I’ve been reading your posts about proper “tweet-ness” and manners.

    I promise to copy all of your tweet instructions, as well as a post by Nathan Bransford, which I am told is great and learn wht the heck I am twittering and tweeting about.

    Love your attitude and the positive way you present yourself and your work. I #amediting? Well, I am editing a WIP being sent to my BETA readers on June 6th. I am a believer in deadlines, those set for me and those I set for myself.

    I do promise here in public to learn to tweet … cell phone language is something my daughter and granddaughter can do as I absolutely draw the line at calline anyone over the age of reason my BFF.

    Thanks for another informative post 🙂

    1. Listen, all of this stuff takes a long time. And there isn’t just one way to do things (despite my bossy tone in these Twitter posts.) I’ve been on Twitter a bit over a year and I’m just truly feeling like I have a handle on it. I used to feel like I had to reciprocate everything, but I’ve relaxed. And I let days go by without looking at Twitter. It makes it all more manageable. I think you’re doing great! With the blog and Twitter!

  12. You’ve given me a lot to think about. I’m afraid I’m often an offender (guilty of all of the above), thinking I was being genuinely appreciative. However, if that’s not how the tweets are viewed by receivers, then I need to reconsider whether I should still do it. I appreciate the reality check!

    1. Julia, there’s no right and wrong here. I’m sure the people you have been thanking (“the receivers”) DO appreciate it! It’s the other 600+ followers who don’t need to see it (in my opinion). It don’t mean that just for YOU . . . for anybody! Promoting someone by RTing or writing something personal about them is one thing, but the simple thank you can go out as an @reply/@mention or DM (in my opinion). But more importantly, read Natalia’s comment from earlier today. She makes a great point about the need to let go of feeling like we all have to acknowledge every single gesture on Twitter and on our blogs. It’s too much for all of us!!!! And most people understand that nobody can spend all their time thanking people or acknowledging. Right? Anyway, I no longer acknowledge every RT, WW, FF, etc. I try to be generous through RTing posts, commenting on posts, and more meaningful things like that. You do such a great job of that too! You should give yourself a little break, hon.

  13. Good point, and I try to thank everyone via DM. But when you are fortunate enough to get tons of #FF’s, etc. Sometimes it is expeditious to do it publicly en masse. I feel very strongly that if someone mentions you, it is essential to give a thank you. And Rting mentions also gives publicity to those who mentioned you. Sometimes the world just creates this kind of “busy work.” Just as probably what I am saying has already been said in the other comments, but I was too busy to read them! *sigh* molly

    1. Hi Molly! A few things . . . I think the en masse thanks are totally fine. But I don’t understand why people do them as regular tweets. Those thank yous don’t really give publicity. It’s not like people read others’ tweets like that . . .really only the people being thanked notice that tweet. The only true publicity, in my opinion, is RTing someone else’s post. Thanking people for our own is a nice way to say “I noticed your RT, WW, etc.), but it’s not publicity for other people. I think it’s important people realize the difference and therefore maybe can feel less pressured to thank every single mention. I’ve definitely stopped thanking for every WW/FF as many of them are clearly automated. You’re right about the busy work–part of the landscape here. I’m hoping to lessen it a bit for all of us! 🙂

  14. Hi Nina! I’m so trying to figure all this out! The hardest for me is the #WW #FF thing. Really, I feel like I have to reciprocate! So hoping I get the idea and try to @reply rather than spew it all out there to everyone…whew…tweeting is more complicated than just 140 characters. Wondering if others are writing posts talking about rude people who don’t thank enough? Can’t win! So I will just do as my grandma would have advises and hush my mouth. 🙂

    1. Hi! Listen, so many of those WW/FF are automated or part of giant lists. I think if you’re one of those, you can skip the thank you. Or thank people for them every so often, and do that as @replies, not regular tweets. Or even DMs? But it’s not a black/white thing. (There are no rules, I just pretend there are.) I think in general if you acknowledge people from time to time and try to reciprocate through RTs of their links or good news then that’s so much more meaningful than the weekly “thank you” or the weekly WW/FF tweet. Maybe I’m delusional . . . this is all my opinion anyway and nothing more. 😉

  15. Thank you! Not doing the #FF or #WW thing, trying to keep my RT to a minimum, and only if I really have something to say. Totally in agreement re: Charlie Brown’s teacher. I know I’m a newbie, but still don’t feel I need to copy behaviors that annoy me.

  16. This post knocked my socks off, Nina. Incredibly helpful! (Dare I say thank you?) 🙂

    Like many of the posters above, I thought I was following Twitter protocol by thanking everyone and her brother. But after weeks of thanking a slew of random people, I – like you – had had enough. Unfortunately, before I read your post, I didn’t know what to do about it. I didn’t want to appear rude. (This is coming from someone who wrote thank you notes on her honeymoon!)

    Perhaps if we all established some kind of “You-don’t-have-to-thank-me” policy, the Twitterverse would become a more manageable place.

    Thanks again (oops, I take that back…). 🙂

    1. Melissa–I’m all over the thank you notes too, which is why I consider the thanking issue on Twitter to be a “crisis.” It feels so wrong to not thank everyone BUT . . . it’s becoming hard to find the true content on Twitter, which means we ALL have to relax a bit on the constant thanking. So glad you liked the post! Yes, I appreciate the warm thank you. I do! 🙂

  17. #WWs, #FFs, #MMs, etc are the equivalent of chain letters. It’s Twitter pollution. The practice must die. I think we should all take a pledge to make it stop now. 😉

  18. I constantly agonize over this. Sometimes public thank you’s seem appropriate. Sometimes, not. I used to thank people publicly for RTs and WWs/FFs to get them some more followers if possible. Now it does seem a little out of control.

    I just take it on a case by case basis and try to thank via @mention for the most part.

    Great points to consider.

    1. Hi Erika, so this issue of thanking someone to help THAT PERSON has come up a few times today. I honestly think the only true publicity for a person is an RT of their link or their good news or whatever OR a very personal #FF. But I don’t really see how thanking the person for RTing you will get that person more followers. Maybe it’s just me, but I’ve never followed someone simply because they’d RTed someone else. You know what I mean? And yes, it’s all out of control now!!!

  19. Well…it is called a social network. If it were LinkedIn, I could see it being annoying.

    I thank people a little less than I used to, for some of the reasons you mention, but if they compliment me, I thank them, and if they are someone who doesn’t follow me yet but have RT’d something from someone who does, often times, I find, a simple @reply thanking them earns me a follow, which I’m grateful for, and I follow back on those occasions—and I can’t DM someone who isn’t following me, so a public thanks is required. But also, as @EdanL has noted, sometimes Twitter feels too much like everyone talking and no one listening, and even a short thank you can break up the robotic intensity of people building their brands relentlessly and remind you that they’re human. And a thank you between folks can begin conversations that go somewhere—they can be icebreakers. I can understand you find it annoying, but I’d say, that moment you speak of is a short one usually, and it doesn’t last long in your life. But the relationships that start out of those moments last a lot longer.

    1. I hear you, and I agree with some of this. I always thank for newer RTs and particularly kind ones. (same goes for WW/FF). But I maintain the best way to truly thank someone is to eventually RT something about them, visit their blog, etc. Of course there is no perfect system and it doesn’t have to be so black and white or tit for tat. With SO MUCH thanking happening out there though, I disagree with you that it comes off like a nice break. It feels more like an interruption and it becomes hard to find actual content on Twitter–especially on Wednesdays and Fridays. I agree that it often feels like everyone is talking and nobody is listening . . . I think the constant thanking adds to that feeling rather than alleviates it as you’re suggesting. I guess we have to agree to disagree here!

  20. Agreed on all points. I frequently return RT’s by RT’ing and most of the time #FF the ones who #FF me or thank them at least. However, sometimes it feels rude NOT to thank for the RT’s provided someone has RT’ed something yu are promoting. I don’t get thanking new followers or RT’ing tweets that contain your own name, with few exceptions. So I try to stay away from those myself. But overall, I don’t mind the self-servitude too much because everyone is just trying to do what they have come to do on twitter, apart from meeting new people obviously: promote their work or their hobby or whatever. 🙂

  21. I just joined Twitter a couple of weeks ago and have been trying to figure out how to use it appropriately. The first person I followed sent me a thank-you message with a link to her blog and I really appreciated that, whether it was automated or not. Personally, I like all the public thanking (which I think is sadly lacking in our offline lives these days!) and I do check out who people #FF and have followed a few. Similarly, I enjoy the RTs because they often introduce me to new people or information I find interesting. However, I don’t have very many followers right now and I suppose these practices could become annoying to someone who receives a lot of updates.

    1. Hi! I have to single out one thing in the list you wrote . . . I have no problem with RTs! RTs are the main point of Twitter. If we all just tweeted about ourselves Twitter would be FACEBOOK. The RTs are for sure what makes Twitter go ’round. Imagine though, you were following 500 people and each of these people publicly thanked EVERY person who RTed their link or added them to a WW/FF. Then you’d find yourself having to sift through tweets to find those good RTs and Tweets. See what I’m talking about? Thanks for the comment here!

  22. Once again, Nina Badzin for the win! Nina, where were you when I joined Twitter a year and a half ago? Your tips have changed the way I tweet. This series on thank you’s, in particular, is so great—and such a relief to read.

    1. Just remember . . . this is all MY opinion, I’m not an expert. But many people on Twitter comments today and in the comments here seem to agree. So it’s a relief for all of us.

  23. Well, you do seem to know what you’re doing, and judging from the crazy number of RTs I just got after RTing your post, I’d say you struck a nerve. I don’t mind the occasional thank you, but the constant stream of it does get tiring, and fast.

  24. I enjoyed your post- very helpful and as a relatively new tweep, confirmation of some things I’ve questioned on protocol. Of course, then I retweeted your blog link and said I agree with you. So now I think I’ve inadvertently done that which I shouldn’t be doing. 😐 Ah Twitter, you rascally devil.

    1. Hi! I think you’re misunderstanding! RTing is the bread and butter of Twitter. If I now went and spent my entire day writing thank you tweets to every person who RTed this post, I’d be clogging the Twitter stream. But I can send all the tweets I want promoting others. See the difference? Constantly thanking people is still really about ME. RTing other peoples’ posts is the whole point of Twitter!!!! (Otherwise it would be Facebook.) And . . . thanks for the RT! It’s OKAY to say thank you on Twitter too!! I’m just advocating we find ways to not make Twitter all about thank yous to the point where it’s annoying.

  25. I don’t spend much time thinking about how people use Twitter. If I don’t like how they do it I simply unfollow.

    I have had a few people complain about my use of it and asked them who was holding a gun at their head because I certainly am not forcing anyone to follow.

    AutoDMs are obnoxious, they make me crazy.

    I don’t mind #FF where one person is listed or a link to a blog post is provided. That makes sense to me.

    Twitter is just one big conversation and as long as people engage that is cool with me.

  26. I *strongly* dislike the RT’ing of #WW/#FF lists. Okay, folks, I saw the list the first time, why do I need to see it a second time? 🙂

    I know I tweet a lot, so I very consciously choose when to publicly tweet and when to do the @reply. Probably about 60-80% of my tweets are @replies. I thank others for linking to my posts, but I *always* do it as an @reply. I don’t want to annoy my followers, so using @replies is good manners. Thanking with public tweets is using bad manners to show off your good manners. 🙂

    I completely agree with you about not thanking for new followers or blog visits. The only time I do either of those is when I have something else to say, and in that case, I use the @reply again.

    1. Jami! This was great! I LOVE this line .. . you need to tweet it or something! “Thanking with public tweets is using bad manners to show off your good manners.” GENIUS.

  27. Thanks Nina for posting this. Even as a twitter newb I was overwhelmed with all the thanking, feeling I wasn’t doing enough and that it seemed like a pointless tweet. Your post helps to clarify people’s intentions and etiquette. Nicely worded! I’m going to tweet about it for you. LOL.

    1. Jess–thanks for making this point. Yes, I think most people have good intentions. And if you’re only following 50 or so or even 100, it’s hard to imagine what it’s like to follow many more and keep saying the same kind of generic tweets. So hopefully people have other ways to think about thanking others now. It’s not that I think we should STOP thanking people . . . let’s just reign it in a bit! 🙂

  28. First off I love the new look of your blog!

    Second I have a different “agenda” when it comes to twitter than you and most of your followers. So I’m tickled pink anytime my phone dings and tells me I’ve been mentioned on twitter LOL. I agree Fridays are annoying as I have to scroll through the same tweet RT’ed by 50 different people because they were all mentioned on the same #FF but it doesn’t bother me that much. I really love and appreciate the thanks and any mentions I get so I just assume others feel the same. I’m probably going to continue as I always have but I’m not an egregious offender of the above mentioned crimes 😉

    I admit I came here first thing this morning because you mentioned that you thought you lost followers over this and I can’t really understand why. You made your case clear and it made sense – even if I don’t plan on following it – why would people stop following you over this? Seems silly. As always another great post. I will be tweeting this as I know a LOT of other people who could benefits from the @reply instead of RT.

    1. Hi Tayna! You’re the only one who noticed the new look. Thanks! 🙂 Let me be clear about the thank you stuff . . .there IS a place for gratitude on Twitter. It would be read to NEVER acknowledge others. I’m simply trying to make sure people get that all those thank yous can be done in other ways some of the time (like @replies instead of regular tweets). But yes, we should continue showing our gratitude and mentioning people. But doesn’t it feel 1000% times better when someone mentions you in an interesting way rather than a list of #FF? I think so! I’m thinking nobody minds being thanked, but many of us don’t like seeing constant thanking going on in the stream. @replies would help!

    2. Yes you’re right I prefer that someone’s mentioning me for a specific purpose. And I think #ff has run its course, we can all stop now LOL. I love this series and I really like – and noticed – how you started thanking everyone at one time at the end of the day. I hope my friends read this and understand. I’ve already had one person appologize to me for “messing up your timeline”. LOL that wasn’t the purpose of me re-tweeting this it was just to give them something to think about.

  29. Wow. This is great. I’ve been bothered by these practices for a while, and have been guilty of several, myself. Thanks for putting it all together so neatly. I will try to be a better Twitter citizen in the future.

  30. THANK YOU (not a tweet). I follow a few people who grossly overuse this
    thanking, thanking blah blah blah
    and it is SOOOOO annoying.
    The earlier post you link to (twitter tips) is uber helpful. I’ve only been on twitter a little while, and I needed that info!

  31. I agree. I don’t think a thank you is necessary for a RT of a blog post but if it’s am engaging convo or something funny that was RTed the author should attempt to thank.
    Too many tweeters out there who live in their own social bubbles.

    1. Hi Leighann! I know what you’re saying. I don’t like it when, for example, someone (like an author) asks a questions like “Did people use the expression make love in the 40s?” then doesn’t acknowledge the people who answered . . . even with a simple thanks en masse. In that kind of case or in others it’s not a “thank you” I’m personally looking for, but perhaps an acknowledgement of some kind . . .a “hey, I know you’re out there and exist.”

      What I generally object to is what I’m seeing overall: The same WWs/FFs and thank yous going on all the time. All this recycling of the same names just seems to redundant and a waste of everyone’s time. Reaching out to new people though–yes, in the form of thank yous, is always a good thing though.

  32. This is a great post(which I happened upon due to a RT :))! I was wondering if I missed some memo when I signed up for Twitter about polite RTing/thanking. Good to know there aren’t some rules I’ve been missing. I have to admit, I’ve done the thanks for the #FF RT the whole thing a couple times. I stopped because it felt a little dirty. My philosophy, if it feels self-serving and would be annoying to see in your own Twitter stream, it is, so don’t do it.

    1. Hi jessica and welcome! I think the most problematic part of RTing the whole list of the #FF is that more often than not, the person sending out the RT doesn’t actually follow everyone on the list. But yes, the worst part is seeing the same list of names over and over again in the Twitter stream. So glad you found me! I should probably thank the person who sent you via the RT! 😉

  33. I totally agree, Nina. I think it’s better just to @ reply that person and thank them, rather than clog up everyone else’s stream by thanking each person publicly. It also annoys me when people #FF or #WW EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THEIR 300 FRIENDS and clog up my stream that way, too. I mean, #FF or #WW a select few this week if you want, and then move on. Also a little annoying when that person NEVER chats with me or @ replies me, checks out my blog, or anything and includes me in the list. That’s great if you pay attention to my tweets, but let me know every now and then or something. I love your Twitter Tips! Hope you’ll continue to bring ’em on (should the need arise)!

    1. Yes–the bit about the person doing the FF never chatting with me any other time, visiting the blog, replying to a tweet, or ANYTHING is the most annoying part of the FF concept. Why are they suggesting their followers follow someone they don’t “really” follow?

  34. Thanks for the excellent post. I agree with you completely on the random lists thanking new followers, and #WW or #FFs. I never click on anyone in those lists. It’s like spam.

    I do, however, thank people for RTs (using @reply so that it doesn’t clog up everyone’s feed), and it’s fun to be thanked in return. I think it let’s people know you appreciate them taking that time and builds a sense of community. As long as you use the @reply, I don’t think it’s a problem. Twitter moves so fast that the message is gone almost immediately (except to the person you addressed).

    For me, the key to DM thanks to people for following is to not promote yourself and to not automate them. I only send a DM to people I follow back, and I do it because when I was new to Twitter, those DMs from other people helped me feel welcome to a new social media forum that I was very uncomfortable with.

    1. Hi! Yes, I think thanking for RTs is great–AS @REPLIES. I also don’t take it personally when people don’t thank me as I know that spending all of our time covering every person who RTed us, etc, would eat up way too much time. I much rather see someone RT something of mine some other time in return or visit my blog or something like that. BUT, of course a thank you is a nice thing too. As a side note, remember @replies are an improvement but they go to anyone who follows both you and the person you’re mentioning, not just that person.

      As for the DMs, I believe advice out there exists to do that after someone follows you, but I’ve never seen it myself, I wonder if it’s older advice?? Everything I’ve seen emphatically says not to. A better way to thank someone for the follow is to respond to a tweet they wrote. (In my opinion.)

      And you are right–this is ALL opinion!!! There is no true right and wrong in the Twitter game. 😉

  35. Yeah, Twitter’s confusing me a bit, with all the contradictory info out there about what’s “polite”. Some folks say TO thank folks for following w/ polite DM (that isn’t a sales pitch), some folks say DON’T.

    #ww & #ff tend to annoy me. The rare times I participate, I keep my tweet focused on a particular person worth following and why I think they’re worth following.

    I guess Twitter’s like life: everyone has their own ideas about what’s polite, and some of ’em contradict.

    1. Hi! Yes, for sure we all have different opinions! I mentioned in my response to the last person who commented on DMs that I’ve only seen EMPHATIC advice not to do this. It’s better to respond to a person’s tweet in some way, in my opinion. But I believe that you’ve seen other people say the opposite!

  36. At the risk of sounding like I’m ignoring all your fabulous advice, THANK YOU for this post. Really. I totally agree that sometimes it’s all we see on Twitter. Thanks, thanks, thanks. Guilty as charged. But not for self-promotion purposes (I’ve got that one covered by obnoxiously sending out the same tweet over and over). Instead, it’s because I worry that the people thanking me will be offended if I don’t thank them back since it’s become such common practice. I’ll also betcha that lots of people out there are doing the same thing for the same darn reason. Here’s hoping that this post goes viral and becomes the new etiquette guideline so all the superfluous thanking will come to an end.

    1. First of all, thanking someone on their personal blog is ALWAYS welcome! And again, it’s not like individuals don’t want to be thanked, but if we can think of Twitter as a large community, then perhaps we can make a point of not forcing the ENTIRE community to read every message we decide to write. Some messages are more appropriate for the smaller group (So better as @metions or DMs). And since most of us can be reasonable about understanding that NOBODY can write a thank you for every person every time, I don’t know why we can’t ALL be more reasonable with the “guilt” issue of feeling like it’s expected. I don’t know if that made sense. Sigh–well, I hope this posts helps a little! 🙂

  37. I think you are right, we have gone overboard with the thanking. I include myself because I just thanked a half dozen people in a row, LOL. (actually they thanked me and I you’re welcomed them which is probably as annoying…or possibly MORE annoying). I think it stems from a good place to want to thank people and because now it has become expected. I agree with the above comment and hope this goes viral and all the cloying politeness stops. 🙂

  38. I do enjoy a Thank You from people when I RT them.

    And I do enjoy a Thank You if I have been able to help someone out with info. they threw out into twitter.

    I appreciate a sincere Thank you.

    It does make me smile.

    I thank sincerely, and I go with what feels right, in that moment.

    I know I am always screwing up, so I’ve decided to just not think about it anymore.

    There is a lot of rudeness on twitter, why not err on the side of nice, right?

    As always, you really know your stuff.

    1. Hi Alexandra! So I don’t think anyone here is arguing about whether we like to be thanked. The issue is whether 500 people need to see that thank you. I’m just hoping people at least start writing the thank yous at @mentions so they clog up the stream less. I’d also love if people didn’t find it rude not to get a thank you all the time. Personally, I’d rather get an RT in the future–even months away–then a generic thank you. Not that I expect anyone to keep track or remember I RTed them . . . I guess my point is that there are more meaningful ways to connect than the name-dropping back and forth. You know what I mean? I for sure forget people sometimes and hope they understand. With that in my mind, I 100% let it go when someone doesn’t thank you. Frankly, I’d NEVER remember who I RTed and didn’t anyway! I’m sure I’m not alone in that, therefore, we can all stop expecting ourselves to mention every name every time. I seriously think I’m turning into Oscar the Twitter Grouch. 😉

  39. I agree 100% with you. I feel the same way about #followfridays that simply list 10 names. Why on earth would I want to follow those people? Pick one or two people and tell my why I should be following them. Maybe that way, I will.

  40. I thought this was interesting so I will retweet this but I will not expect a thank you because I know you will be busy looking through all the other stuff.

  41. I hate to be a thorn, but when thanking people for taking the time out of their days to do something for you becomes an issue, our world is far too self-serving. When the attitude of “My time is to precious to have to read thank yous” takes over, it’s a sad, sad world.

    Come on, Tweets, thanking is gracious. If you don’t want to read the thank yous, pass over them, but please don’t tell others not to be kind. And as far as thanking privately- if you are thanking for a mention, many times the person does not follow you, and in the case of Twitter, you CANNOT send a DM to those who do not follow you.

    Sorry, guys, I’ll always err on the curtious side.

    Thank you for posting this. It is food for thought and I appreciate your candor, even if I don’t agree with it 100%.

    1. Hi Melissa,

      I appreciate your honesty here. I’m sure other people agree with you, but haven’t had the courage to comment. I agree thanking is great. I still think it can be done as an @reply so some of your followers see that tweet and not all. Isn’t it most important that the person you are thanking sees it? Retweeting someone’s link is a different story and should be totally public so the person you’re retweeting gets that exposure. A personal thank you or comment to one person doesn’t need to go to 100+ people in my opinion, which is where an @reply helps.

      Thanks again for reading the post and taking the time to comment. Nina 🙂

  42. I agree with that last one for sure! RTing a whole list just clogs things up–for everyone, including those trying to figure out who to thank for the #FF.

    I think there is a lot of ‘filler on twitter’ so I minimize my thanking to mentions and Rts. I try to always follow back as much as possible (not if it’s a company looking for business, or someone with no personal info) and see that as all that is needed. I also do not send DMs for following me. I can always tell the automated ones, and the ones asking me to visit them at XYZ drives me nuts. Interact with me on a regular basis and you can bet I’ll be checking you out, otherwise, it’s just advertizing.

    Thx for the tips!

    Angela @ The Bookshelf Muse

  43. These are excellent points. When people sign on with Twitter, I don’t know that they’ve investigated it’s ‘manners.’ And those that have been around while and still do the things you’ve mentioned appear to be ‘all about me’ whether they know it or not, intend it or not.

    The quickest way for an unfollow from me: Send me a dm thanking me for the follow, a ‘please visit my site,’ and NO return follow. Come on.

    And yes, the #WW and #FF get overwhelming, especially if there’s a long list in one tweet, and then repeated tweets from the same person with MORE #WWs and #FFs.

    Any kind of self-promotion via Twitter is a turn off for me (and I see so much of it on there). Yikes.

  44. From your screen to the Twitterbugs’ fingers, please!

    I’m new to twitter, and was feeling bad for not jumping into the #ww #ff frenzy, because I didn’t know what I was doing (which I still feel, mostly). After a couple months on Twitter, I have NEVER clicked on one of those links and decided to follow somebody because they were in the long string of, as you put it, Charlie Brown teacher twaddle. Sometimes I have seen a retweet of someone who sounded very funny or original, and then decided to Follow them, but even though I still follow comparitively few people, I often feel overwhelmed by the volume and the noise.

  45. Ugh I unfollowed someone bc ALL they did was tweet out twitter handles, I guess of new followers. Never any actual tweets. What’s the point?

    1. And I just unfollowed someone who adds me to a list of #wws and #ffs EVERY SINGLE WEEK but responds to not one other thing I tweet. Ever. So even though I was in the lists, I couldn’t stand it. It just seems so silly to me. Spread the word! The more people who thank as @replies rather than regular tweets the better!

  46. I agree with most of your points regarding the thank you streams (they can be excessive), except the Direct Message thank you. If you use a direct message to thank someone and send a personal message that doesn’t have anything to do with self promotion, I think that is one of the best ways for others not to have to see your thank yous. I don’t participate in the WWs and FFs. And I try to just post content or comment on peoples’ tweets that I find interesting.

    1. Oh–you misunderstood. I 100% think DM thank yous are fine! The only reason not to them is because they can do tedious as you have to do one at a time. With the @reply you can list a bunch of people and only those people will see it but you don’t have to send ten separate DMs. And you totally “get” Twitter by the way. You were a quick study! 😉

    2. Wow. I am so new to twitter, and have no idea what I am doing. Thanks for your advice, I agree with a lot of it, but mostly, I think I agree about thanking via direct message from now on. I certainly do not want to come off as “me, me, me!” I still don’t quite understand the “ff” thing … I guess I have a lot of research to do.

      1. Hi there— let me give you some advice. I wouldn’t thank via DM either. People don’t like receiving too many DMs. It’s just another folder to have to check. Best thing to do is just thank (when you need to) in the regular Twitter stream using an @reply. Meaning, write the tweet like this:

        @NinaBadzin, thanks for the retweet today!

        Do NOT write it like this:

        Thanks for the retweet @NinaBadzin.

        Written the first way, only I and the people who follow us both will see it. Written the second one, all of your followers will see it. And why do all of your followers need to see you thanking just ME?

        See! It makes good sense. Let me know if you have questions.

  47. I am SO with you on the RT of #FF entire list — & the practice of #FF as well. I to have many who include me in an #FF list with the same people very week … but never talk to me otherwise. & the RT of the entire #FF is totally a “they love me, they really love me” type of twitter user.

    you have some really great tips here!

  48. I love your twitter series. When you’re late to the party (as I am) it’s really tough to try to figure out who’s a good model and who isn’t. Having explicit guidelines is a much faster to come up to speed (hopefully allowing you to avoid twitter-culture fauxpas…fauxpas’s?)
    I’m going right this very minute to create some lists (following the instructions in part 2) so I can try to manage the overwhelming flow of incoming tweets…Thanks for this!

    1. You’ll be so happy to have those lists! It takes some time to get used to hopping from list to list, but once it becomes a habit, you won’t look at the general stream again. I’m so glad the posts have helped. 🙂

  49. See, I kinda want to stop the whole #FF thing, because those are exactly my thoughts. If someone #FFs me, I feel like they’re 1. looking for a thanking RT and 2. A #FF tweet back. The whole thing is just annoying.

    I don’t think I’m going to play anymore.

  50. I see I’m close to 100 responders. I can see why. These Twitter Tips are the best I’ve ever found (after paying $8 for a book on the subject which didn’t give much hands-on information). One of my blogger friends who follows you, Christine Grote aka @CMSmith 57, sent me your way. I’m about to print out this list, and hope I can learn Twitter, partly to promote my book (as my publisher keeps pushing at me). I’m 71 years old, and at times this all gets very boggling. I know I’ll never understand everything, but I think I now see how the @ works. Also the direct message. The lists sounds confusing, but I’m going to work on that now. And also read your blogging tips (I’ve been blogging for 16 months and still find I have things to learn in this area).

    I’m SO happy I found you!

  51. I’m here, very late, via your posts on Writer Unboxed…

    I agree 100%. The only time I ever pay attention to #FF or #WW tweets is if the tweet is personalized and specific, for example: “I recommend following these two great steampunk authors: @___ and @___” or “Follow @___ because she…” (and then something specific about why she’s worth following that matches what I see if I click through to look at her Twitter stream). One or two or three names in a tweet, no more.

    Otherwise I just scroll on by, wishing my stream weren’t so clogged up on Fridays. I do sometimes thank people for #FF mentions or RTs, but only via an @reply.

  52. Hi Nina! I’m late to your Twitter series, but have caught up and started using all of your useful tips! Thanks so much for doing this. I’ve only been actively using Twitter for the past month and can admit that I have done some of the no-no’s you mentioned. But no longer! 🙂 I do have one question for you about thanking. I get a lot of thank yous for retweeting people’s content or posting tweets about fellow writer’s blogs. I have been saying “you’re welcome” to these thank yous. Should I stop doing that as well? p.s. all of the thank yous and you’re welcomes are happening via @replies so I don’t think I’m polluting the twitter stream, but I wanted to make sure.

    Thanks again for such a useful Twitter guide. 🙂

  53. OK, what I’m about to say might sound a little ironic in light of your message, but honestly, THANK you for this post. I’m relatively new to Twitter and I see a lot of people thanking people for follows, RTs, etc. I thought I was supposed to, but at the same time it was starting to feel like overkill. This post has absolved me of my confused sense of obligation. I’m definitely going to work my way through the rest of your Twitter tips…and RT this one while I’m at it. 🙂

  54. While I think it’s good to analyse patterns of gratitude, I believe in a “laissez faire” approach when it comes to social networking tools. I’m all for regulating and weeding out hate mails and tweets, but “thank you” tweets in all their many shades of green, blue and red? I say “Happy Thank You More Please” and when I’m not in the mood, I simply turn my back. All those so-called rules have not really changed the face of the earth or the nature of social media. Only content does—the nature of the game is give and take: just as in the “first” life, this “second” life rests upon performing these two tasks as good as you can, and everybody does it differently. It’s that diversity that I appreciate about Twitter.

  55. Loved your Twitter Series! So helpful. I took your advice and decided to join. Right now feeling a little like the new girl in town on the first day of school… I’m a little nervous but excited.
    Thanks Nina!

  56. Oh I wholeheartedly agree! When I think about all the tweets I COULD have read instead of the thank you’s and the auto DMs and the real content I could have received, it makes me feel just a little disappointed. I LOVE interacting with people on Twitter and I have gotten SO very tired of the automation part of it. I actually talk about this a bit in Why Automating Twitter Defeats the Purpose http://charitykountz.com/why-automating-twitter-defeats-the-purpose/. I think the thank you’s and #ff / #ww are all automation and are simply a waste. Twitter is meant to be micro – what’s the most important thing you can say in 140 characters? I doubt it’s thank you’s unless it’s a very personalized shout out. I love to share insights into my followers who I have really engaged with or who have awesome content others would enjoy. I kinda think of myself as a filter – and part of what I’m filtering out is the best content and information I can find. Twitter is a really good tool for that.

    Great post as always Nina!

  57. Nina, I can’t tell you how helpful this stuff is for a Twitter newbie! Just came here from Amber West’s blog…and will revisit your other posts when I get a chance. Two questions: (1) Recently, a new follower started a ‘thank someone everyday tweet’ as part of a hashtag #thankyouproject. I was really excited to have something meaningful to say at last, and thought it’s a great way of putting positive vibes out there (instead of talking about me, which I don’t find that interesting). Now I’m worried it will just annoy people. What are your thoughts on this? (2) It always feels rude to me just to follow back. Surely a personalised ‘hi, how are you doing?’ or something is ok?

    1. I’m so glad you liked the post, Alarna!

      Your questions are great!

      #1. The “thank someone every day” concept is great. I think it’s more effective than #FridayFollow and it’s totally different than the disingenuous “Thanking” that drives me bonkers. I’d keep it to one person a day though.

      #2. I disagree that it’s rude to just follow someone or to follow back without saying “hi” or “thanks” or even anything. The follow IS the “hello” and “thanks.” A “thanks for following” is sort of redundant and kind of meaningless too. What means SO much more and what will make someone remember you is a retweet or even better, a visit to that person’s blog! Twitter is not like a regular conversation that needs constant back and forth. So all those “thanks” and “you’re welcome” aren’t really adding to the conversation. It might seem rude if you’re applying the rules of NORMAL conversation. But keep in mind that twitter is meant to be a quick, useful stream of info. So those little bits of extra conversation actually get in the way. Like I said, instead of saying thanks for hi, retweet someone’s link. They’ll absolutely appreciate that 1000 times more.

      Hope that helps! 🙂

  58. Great tips! I didn’t know about the @reply, that’s really good to know. I’ve been sort of following the examples of a few others on Twitter, but have realized that some DO come across as self-serving rather than sincere with their thank yous, and realizing I still have a lot to learn. Can’t wait to read the rest of your series!

    1. Kate, I’m so glad the tips helped and hopefully the rest in the series will too. (I’m pretty confident you’ll like the other posts!) Thanks for visiting. 🙂 Going to check you out now!

  59. Thank you for this post 😉 I couldn’t agree more. I don’t mind a personalized thank you via a private message, however what I hate the most is the personal messages that only promote their blog/websites. My thoughts on this are….”Obviously I am already interested in your website/blog for I have decided to follow you, and because I already follow you I most definitely don’t need another forceful introduction to your website/blog!” I realize that everyone is all about self-promotion, but it gets to be a little much!

    I am heading over to check out your other ‘Twitter Tips’!

    1. Kim,

      You nailed it. I feel exactly the same way. If I already followed you, just start engaging, do not then “invite” me to check out your blog, etc. It’s redundant and a big turn off. So glad there are people out there who don’t think I’m crazy. I’ve received some (not a lot, but some) negative comments from this post too! 😉

      Thanks for visiting and taking the time to comment, Nina

  60. I completely agree! I avoided twitter forever and now that I’m actively using it, I realize why I avoided it. I’ve wanted to unfollow people for this very reason, they’re just clogging up my twitter feed.

  61. I’m not going to lie…I am giggling through this whole thing because BOOM, woman! You hit the nail on the head! nothing more depressing than to wake up, get your coffee, log onto twitter and think, “YAY! lot’s of mentions!” only for it to be a much of useless #FF or #WW lists and lists and LISTS!

    Also, I have a few people who RT my tweet every time they reply to me. WEIRDSIES!

    I miss all my twitter conversations. It’s all links and lame RTs/thank you @s.

    1. Katie! I’m so glad you appreciated the post. It’s one I hope people will listen to. Sometimes I feel like I’m talking to myself. WHY do people think that 1000+ people or even 50+ people want to see them thank a few other people.

      THE WORST is the RTs of those #ww/#ff lists with the “thx” right before. PAINFUL.

    1. I know–it’s hard when it feels like everyone is doing it . . . that’s why writing them thank you tweets as @replies instead of regular tweets at least helps a little bit. Thanks for visiting! 🙂

  62. I found your tips by way of SITS. I’ve had an account and not done much with it. Even in this single installment of your series, you’ve explained a ton. I’m looking forward to reading the rest.

  63. I use the favorite button as an “I saw what you did there, and I appreciated it!” Occasionally, if it’s a totally new person or a new follower, I’ll tweet a thank you. It’s always an @yourhandlehere tweet, however. And it’s never just a “Thanks!” Newer Tweeters do appreciate something to RT that has their handle in it as it helps them get some recognition and kudos from others. For those that care about Klout (anyone?), it also helps them.

    1. Interesting—I use the favorite button as a bookmark so I can read the linked article later. So when people thank me for doing so, it feels REALLY unnecessary because I’ve most likely not read their post yet and won’t necessarily be retweeting it or even commenting on it when I do.

      An RT is different than a thank you tweet of course! I also try to RT a variety of people–but always based on something they wrote, their blog in general, etc . . . not just for RTing ME. It’s a big difference.

      Klout is the devil. 😉

      In all seriousness, thanks for taking the time to comment and for finding me on FB and Twitter. I found you back!

      1. I used to use the Favorite button as a bookmark, but it became unmanageable! What I meant is that I use it as a Thank You in itself. I’ll “Favorite” their FF or RT or mention. No one else has to see that – unless they go looking for it. And then they get what they wanted as it is!

  64. OMG I DO some of this!! How long have I been tweeting and all this time I didn’t realize when the @ isn’t FIRST it goes to my entire list!?! I thought it only goes to all people who follow both me and the person I’m replying to. There’s an actual order involved here?

    How is anyone still following me??

    1. Kat, I refuse to believe you didn’t know about the regular tweet vs. the @reply!! You’re such a social media guru. (Love your gorgeous site by the way. Inquired into the designer but I can’t quite go that level. It’s INCREDIBLE!)

      So just to review:

      @NinaBadzin, thanks for the RT! (That goes to people who follow you AND me).

      Thanks for the RT @NinaBadzin. (That goes to your 5000 followers. Yup. In my opinion, 5000 don’t need to see you thank one person or even 5 people. But I’m a crabby patty that way.)

  65. Thanks for a good post on Twitter etiquette. I’m still relatively new to Twitter (just under 5 months) and if I’m honest it can be a little overwhelming at times. I tend to thank people for RT’s of my fitness and nutrition related tweets, as they are sharing the information. Where possible I do it in one swoop, as I appreciate that I’m filling up others Twitter space. I also thank for #FF’s as it tends to be people I’m in contact with, not random ones as observed by some others above. I’m still learning and I’m guilty of some of the things mentioned but I’m sure I’ll get there. Now I’m off to find your previous Twitter tips 🙂

  66. Hi, Nina, Nice to meet you – I’m visiting from SITS. I’m a fitness and nutrition expert working to stay on top of the blog, twitter, video, Google, world. I feel that twitter is the most overwhelming of them all and just stop by there once per day or so for about 5 minutes. My first impression was that the “thank-you’s” were a nice thing to do – acknowledging the follower and maybe giving them some twitter attention/ love!

    1. Hi Luci! My thought: The thanks ARE nice and there’s always room in the world, and on Twitter, for good manners and for being welcoming. But imagine if you’re following 1000+ people and all of those people thank every new follower, etc . . . imagine how boring all those tweets would be. Also, what I find even nicer than a thank you is knowing someone is actually reading my tweets (not just the tweets that show up in their @mentions column)! So I’d take an RT (even just every so often) over a thank you ANY day.

  67. This is so funny! I have to admit, I do some of this. Sometimes, I am so unsure of twitter etiquette. This is helpful, and makes some points are obvious. Visit those who visit you, and follow back, but I am guilty of the RT thanks. I’m just never sure if it’s rude to not say “hey, thanks for the love”, but this gives me some clarity. So THANK YOU! Found you on SITS!

    1. I don’t think there’s any reason not to acknowledge when people help you out, but it’s better to help them back! Also, my main point is–yes, say thank you–but do NOT force all your followers to watch. 😉

  68. Oh. My. Gosh. Yes. I had to turn off the push notifications on my phone because I was running the battery down receiving meaningless Thank You Tweets. This is the best thing I’ve read all week. So glad I ran into this on SITS.

    1. Yes!! People sometimes argue with me about this stuff, but then I see they’re following 50 people. Trying following 500 and reading nothing but thank you after thank you. Right???

  69. This is great! I’m relatively new to Twitter, and I definitely see how all the gratuitous thanking clogs up the twitter stream. Good thing we only have 140 characters with which to over-thank!

  70. Thanks for this tip. I’m new to twitter – and – have NOT thanked anyone. So, I won’t now…ha. No, really, I enjoyed your tip!

    1. Remember, it’s OK and even good to thank when appropriate, just remember to start the tweet with the handle (@NinaBadzin) and do not write the tweet in a way that every one of your followers has to read. It makes all the difference.

  71. Great tips. Going to read the rest of your series. On the point about people thanking people for blog comments on Twitter that bothers me to. It’s like when people just copy paste something that worked on Twitter to Facebook. Just doesn’t make always make sense, or work, each has it’s own rules of engagement. I’m still learning the ropes myself so really appreciate the Twitter Etiquette 101.

    1. That is so true about the Facebook/Twitter thing . . . completely different animals. As for Twitter, I get that “animal” much more than Facebook. I’m happy to help if you have additional questions. Nina 🙂

  72. Yes! Thank you! I’ve been trying to get into twitter, but I see so much “nothing” in my stream that it’s really hard to find things of interest and the whole process winds up feeling pointless. I also wish people would be more specific about what they’re offering (so often it’s a few vague words and a link – am I really going to click all those links?), but that’s another issue.

    1. Thank you, Kathleen! I just switched over to wp.org and lost some pics in the process. Just re-uploaded the one for this post and plan to make some for the rest of the series too. Thanks so much your interest and for the extra push. Check out the picture for the “thanking crisis” post.

  73. I am so glad my critique partner told me to check out your website! I just joined Twitter today and without your tips I would have been lost in the world of Twitter. Each part explains really well how to and how NOT to utilize Twitter. So, thank you for making it a whole lot easier for a total Twitter newbie like me to navigate this new world! I can already understand why people are so addicted to it:-)

  74. I’m kind of new at all this, but I’m learning the ropes. I see what you mean by all those auto tweets and just lists of names. But when someone who isn’t a spambot follows me, I still want to thank them and make it personal. It’s about connecting with people. If I just follow back as my thank you, then how have we connected? Then it’s just a number added to my followers/following people.
    J. L. Mbewe recently posted..Dropping the BallMy Profile

    1. There’s another choice aside from just following back and/or sending a thank you tweet. How about retweeting something that person tweeted, or responding to something that person tweeted. That’s real interaction, which is why we’re all there.

      Thanks for stopping by, J.L.!

      1. Hi! hashtags, especially #mywana has really helped to connect with people on twitter. I’ve responded to people’s tweets, that’s the fun part. 🙂 And I’ve retweeted a few times, but that still feels a little weird, I’m still learning. I agree all that is part of the of why we are there, but I’ve got to connect with the person, or really believe in what I’m retweeting, and I think that starts with a personal hi and thank you, common courtesy.

        in an earlier you comment you said:

        @NinaBadzin, thanks for the RT! (That goes to people who follow you AND me).

        Thanks for the RT @NinaBadzin. (That goes to your 5000 followers. Yup. In my opinion, 5000 don’t need to see you thank one person or even 5 people. But I’m a crabby patty that way.)

        Ack! What is the difference? if the @name is in front, then everyone who follow either of us will see it right? but how is the second one different, if the name is later on the tweet, then it goes to all of the followers??? I’m confused. Maybe I need to read all of your posts about twitter. 🙂

          1. Thanks for the link! I will be reading through it all. I think I’ve got a brain cramp just reading the first post. I’ll take it slow. Thanks!

  75. Nina. I am new to Twitter so I will be reading & rereading your posts. Thanks for such helpful, user friendly material.

  76. Nina, I found these posts via the links in Alison’s Writing, Wishing post today. I love twitter but have been stymied by the whole thanking vs retweeting vs mentioning thing.
    For example, I woke up this morning to a notice that I had been mentioned in a tweet by Oregon Wine Daily. They announced the release of their newsletter saying “…including articles from @Mocadeaux and …”
    This is how I responded: I retweeted their original message and then I replied (starting tweet with @OregonWineDaily) and thanked them for including my post in their newsletter. I also scheduled a tweet for tomorrow mentioning and linking to the newsletter.
    Is this all appropriate? Too much? Too little?
    Mo at Mocadeaux recently posted..The Thanksgiving Dinner When I Almost Poisoned MomMy Profile

    1. So glad the post helped! Just so you know . . . not everyone agrees with me, but if you glance at the comments most agree that all the thanking is not unnecessary. We help each other in other ways (in the ideal situation).

  77. Always mention and RT certain media types I like but ALL they ever do is ‘favorite’ my tweets complimenting THEM??? should I just forget about them? And what’s the deal with KNOWN MEDIA NAMES who follow people but unfollow hours or days later?..Are Twitter ‘favorites’ essentially useless? Aren’t they like saying – I’ll just barely acknowledge you but save the RT’s for them what got names at least as big as mine or bigger…. I mean we can see that’s what they do.. Also bad is when I post an intelligent, carefully thought out tweet about some industry type and they respond with an – Awww, thank you!… like I’m some blushing little kid asking for an autograph. STINKS! Just discovered your site. Thanks for posting. Don’t understand all the Twitter niceties myself.

    1. Hey Billy, I’m sorry that I just saw this. I understand what you’re saying . . . that it feels patronizing to get a “favorite” or a “awww, thanks” from someone with tons of Twitter followers rather than an RT. But think of it from the other side. I don’t see how someone with a big following could possible reciprocate every RT with a return RT. All that person would be able to do all day is find good stuff in followers’ Twitter streams and RT it. So that’s where the “favorite” comes it. I think it is an acceptable way to say, “I saw this and appreciated it.” Also, auto-following really is meaningless. So even if these big media types pushed the follow button to “follow” every back, it’s not as if those tweets are getting read. Nobody really “follows” thousands of people. In that case the follow back is more meaningful than the favorite. Not sure I’m making sense. . . too much Twitter lingo in one comment from me perhaps. Feels like it’s not even English. 😉

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Hi, I'm Nina

HI, I’M NINA BADZIN. I’m a writer fascinated by the dynamics of friendship, and I’ve been answering anonymous advice questions on the topic since 2014. I now also answer them on my podcast, Dear Nina! I’m a creative writing instructor at ModernWell in Minneapolis, a freelance writer and editor, and an avid reader who reviews 50 books a year. Welcome to my site! 

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Hi, I'm Nina

HI, I’M NINA BADZIN. I’m a writer fascinated by the dynamics of friendship, and I’ve been answering anonymous advice questions on the topic since 2014. I now also answer them on my podcast, Dear Nina! I’m a creative writing instructor at ModernWell in Minneapolis, a freelance writer and editor, and an avid reader who reviews 50 books a year. Welcome to my site! 

Get The Newsletter

I send an email once or twice a month with the latest friendship letters, podcast episodes, book reviews, recipes, and more.

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