I LOVE reading about friendship.
Long before I became a friendship advice columnist and the host of the top 1% podcast, Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship, I was and (and still am) an avid reader of every book out there about friendship.
I’m constantly adding more books to my shelf, so I will somtimes go back and edit this list.
Modern Friendship: How to Nurture Our Most Valued Connections by Anna Goldfarb
Anna has been on Dear Nina several times. Her book is one of the best on how to help people figure out which friendships are working, which are not, and why. Check out, “Is it Time For a Friendship Cleanse” on the podcast.
Platonic: How the Science of Attachment Can Help You Make–and Keep–Friends by Dr. Marisa G. Franco
A new gold standard for books about friendship. I was thrilled to have Dr. Franco on Dear Nina in episode #63, “Telling Friends They’ve Let You Down.”
MWF Seeking BFF by Rachel Bertsche
I wrote an entire blog post about this clever memoir in January 2012, which still captures lots of SEO traffic on my blog, perhaps because of the post’s title, “Searching for a New Best Friend.” I could relate well to Bertsche’s struggle to make new friends in a new city, and I loved her methodical way about finding new friends and all the research she did on friendships was seamlessly woven in.
The Friend Who Got Away: Twenty Women’s True Life Tales of Friendships that Blew Up, Burned Out or Faded Away
edited by Jenny Ofill and Elissa Schappell
I read this one in 2005 and it was excellent. A favorite quote: “Every close friendship offers the same fundamental thrill; someone has singled you out and chosen you, someone who no obligation to do so.”
Truth & Beauty: A Friendship
by Ann Patchett
Cannot recommend enough. An incredible in-depth portrait of a real friendship from the talented writer, Ann Patchett.
A favorite quote: “Whenever I saw her, I felt like I had been living in another country, doing moderately well in another language, and then she showed up speaking English and suddenly I could speak with all the complexity and nuance that I hadn’t realized was gone. With Lucy I was a native speaker.”
Big Friendship
by Aminatou Sow and Ann Friedman: I appreciated the honest take in this memoir by best friends Sow and Friedman about the real work it takes to keep an important friendship front and center.
The Myth of You and Me: A Novel
by Leah Stewart
This was another book that I happened to read in 2005, and I absolutely loved it. It’s one of the most realistic novels about a friendship breakup I’ve ever read.
BFF: A Memoir of Friendship Lost and Found by Christie Tate
Christie has been on Dear Nina several times. We’ve discussed envy, friendship triangles, grieving a friend and all the important friendship topics that come up in this fantastic memoir. Check out episode #47!
The Art of Gathering: How We Meet and Why It Matters by Priya Parker
I always way the best way to have plans is to make plans. And if you want plans that happen regularly and your’e ready to host, The Art of Gathering is as thoughtful a guide as you will find.
Creating a Salon by Linda-Marie Barrett is another good one in this category. Linda-Marie was on episode #169 of Dear Nina: “Hosting a Salon: The Friendship Upgrade From Book Clubs”
Same by Hannah Rosenberg is a book of poems that is the perfect gift for your friend to say, “this made me think of you.”
Listen to Hannah on ep #170 of Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship, “The Friend Who Really Sees You.”
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*Links are affiliate links to Amazon, which means if you end up ordering a book through my site, I might earn something like .30 cents at no cost to you. You’re so generous!
Latest posts by Nina Badzin (see all)
- #192 – Why Plans with Friends Don’t Happen—and How to Fix It - April 20, 2026
- #191 – The Case for Work Friends and Where to Find Them - April 13, 2026
- #190 – What Birthdays Reveal About Your Friendships (and Your Mindset) - March 29, 2026
- #189 – Andrew McCarthy on Male Friendship and the Power of Showing Up - March 23, 2026
33 Responses
I would say my day is made, but it’s much more than that.
Thank you so much, Nina; not only for your support and for including me on this list (!!!), but also for your thoughtful understanding of my intentions in Letters for Scarlet.
You are wonderful and I am grateful.
So happy for you I am tearing up.
So completely my pleasure.
I own “My Other Ex” and “The Friend Who Got Away”, and they have been really helpful books! This is a great list, and I’m going to check out the other books.
Of course I retweeted this list in a heartbeat! 😉
Thank you so much for your support of this post (and others!)
I love Truth and Beauty. “Native speakers” has become my shorthand for those friends who are truly of my heart. This is a great list. A Separate Peace is set at my high school.
Oh wow! In finding the quote I wanted to use I ended up rereading a lot of it. I taught that book as well when I was a 9th grade teacher. I have such a spot for it. So cool (and intense!) that it takes place at your school.
Ummmm…to see my sister’s debut novel mentioned among some of my OTHER favorites of all time…by someone OTHER than me?? Nina…you make me smile. And cry. And think we should hang out!! I have wine if you have an opener 🙂
Actually, I have an opener, decanter and all the glasses. I live in Huntington Beach. Wanna come over? I’ll invite Julie ❤️
I love that you commented here. Thank you! I’ve been reading your sister’s blog since the beginning and I’ve been rooting for her all along.
Great list! I had The Myth of You and Me on my to-read list forever and finally checked it out last December, and I just couldn’t get into it. It sounded like such a “me” book but I just wasn’t connecting with the character. Perhaps I’ll try again.
I totally get it. There are plenty of books people love that I just can’t get into. (One of them is the Ferrante series, which would have been perfect for this list in theory except that I couldn’t get into it.)
I haven’t read Truth and Beauty, but am intrigued because she mentions Lucy a lot in This Is the Story of a Happy Marriage. I love all of Allison’s books and can’t wait for In Twenty Years!
Oh Allie, I think you would love it.
Thanks for the great list! I have long had Truth & Beauty sitting on my (virtual) bookshelf. Time to read it!
Yes yes yes! You must!
I certainly love this list. I’ll have to read that Letters For Scarlet book because of my own Scarlet. And Harry Potter is incredible with friendship. As well as A Separate Peace, My Other Ex, and all Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants books!
I thought of you while I was reading Julie’s book! Such a great name.
Absolutely love this list. 💕 Thank you for reminding me of some lovely reads and introducing new ones.
Thanks for reading the post! 🙂
What a fun post, Nina! It makes sense that you’d love friendship books 🙂 I am definitely going to check out the Traveling Pants series for me and my daughter, and I’m very excited for Julie’s debut, Letters for Scarlet. I also loved a book not mentioned here, but one I know you enjoyed, Dear Exile, written by two friends.
Yes! I thought about Dear Exile after I wrote the post, but I decided to save it for a post about letters. Julie’s works for that one, too.
Oooh, I’m finally getting back to including fiction in my reading lists again and a few of these are quite intriguing. I’ll check them out. Thank you!
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I think you’d like many of them!
I cannot wait to read Julie’s book!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I can’t wait for you to read it, too! 🙂
I remember reading A Separate Peace in high school. It’s one of those novels I think would benefit from reading with an adult perspective.
Elena Ferrante’s novels have been praised as terrific stories about friendship. Have you read her novels yet? I’ve not, but they’re on my list.
I could not get into the first Ferrante book!
I love this list, Nina. I read Truth and Beauty several years ago and I still revisit passages from time to time.
Let’s Take the Long Way Home: A Memoir of Friendship by Gail Caldwell is a melancholy, but insightful read detailing the friendship between Caroline Knapp and Caldwell.
What a great list! I loved MWF Seeking BFF (and Rachel herself is delightful) and I also adore the Traveling Pants series.
I read Beth Kephart’s memoir Into the Tangle of Friendship years ago and I remember loving that one, too.
Such great recommendations! I love the idea of looking at books about friendships. And perfect choice to include Harry Potter as I think those books are so great at using that theme throughout.
I can’t believe how few of these I’ve read!!! Some of my favorite friendship books that come to mind are… Just as Long as We’re Together by Judy Blume and Pack of Two by Caroline Knapp I believe. I am sure there will be more I will think of as soon as I hit “submit comment.” I love My Other Ex as a book but also b/c I am pretty sure that was how I originally connected with YOU! Can’t wait to read Truth and Beauty. I read Lucy Greely’s Autobiography of a Face in college and it left a deep imprint on me.
A themed book review post – love this, Nina. I’ve added Letters for Scarlet to my Amazon list. Truth and Beauty has been sitting on my bookshelf for years – I picked it up at a Scholastic Book Fair and never opened it. I will now!