Last week I blogged about my husband’s liberating writing advice exactly four years ago to “just start.” And start I did. During 2007, I wrote random chapters, first paragraphs of stories, essays–anything and everything.
Eventually the false starts got tiring. As a self-proclaimed new “writer” with no training whatsoever, I decided it was time for help. I enrolled in a twelve-week novel-writing course on Thursday nights while Bryan, apparently the perennial hero on this blog, watched the kids.
The instructor was generally hateful. He started each class with a writing exercise then asked each of us to read our paragraphs aloud. He despised everything. “Doesn’t work,” he’d say half-way through someone’s piece, or simply, “Nope.”
I didn’t mind the honest feedback, but he never once in twelve weeks heard something he liked from any of us. Even worse, after his disgust he’d share a page from one of his published novels to grace us with an example of what did work. (Gabriel Garcia Marquez he was not.) He spent the rest of the time reading directly from his notes about basic plot structure–information most of us had read two or three times already from James Scott Bell for $16.99. (Thank you, Mr. Bell.)
BUT THEN, during the final class, this otherwise discouraging instructor shared the most valuable writing advice I’ve heard since Bryan’s “just start.” And I’ve probably read every craft how-to out there, twice, so that’s saying a lot.
He said, [I'm paraphrasing] “Most of you in this room will never publish a word. You’ll give up. I’m no more talented than any of you or anyone else. I just work harder, that’s all.”
Holy crap life-changing aha/light-bulb moment or whatever Oprah would say. His words seem soul-sucking at first, but pay attention. “Work harder” was something we could at least control. There was no golden ticket to publication, but certainly without the strength to persevere we would fail. That message has kept me going ever since.
Some time later (probably a year and a half because I had another baby in there somewhere) I’d written two novels and even experienced some excellent request rates after querying one of them–though ultimately no agent. I’m downplaying the pain of that process. Trust me, it was excruciating. But I got through the disappointment, and I’m still in the game. Next time I query agents (I’m estimating two years from now or more) I’ll have several short story publications to mention in the “publishing history” paragraph I had to leave blank the first time around. Glass half full, people. Glass half full.
My friends and acquaintances who remember my boastful tales about “this agent” or “that one” reading my partial or full manuscript (oops, wouldn’t recommend all that sharing) will still sometimes rightfully wonder, “What ever happened to your book?” And I tell them in my most zen-like voice, “I didn’t work out. I tossed it. I’m writing something new.”
“How can you stand it?” I’m often asked.
I shrug. “This is how it works. It takes a long time.” And believe it or not, I’m at peace with that truth.
I won’t give up. I’ll just work harder, that’s all. NOW WHO’S WITH ME?
Thanks for posting this, Nina. Definitely a good rule for us writers to live by!
Great post, Nina. I’m not sure that the “tough love” approach always works with new writers. But I’m glad you were able to tough it out and continue (and find the glass half full). I’ve ridden in the same boat as you (decent agent requests, telling TOO MANY people that I was in the process, the ultimate rejection). And somehow, I’ve come to terms with the process. I’m writing like mad, working like a dog, but I’m learning, more than anything, the painful lessons of perseverance. Thanks for a great post as usual.
Nina, I can’t tell you how many times on the road to publication I got the old stand-by “Oh, so you tried writing-what’s next?” when I’d decided a queried manuscript would be shelved after enough rejections. And I would look back at them and say plainly, “What’s next? Another book, obviously.” And many of them would seem genuinely perplexed, as if it didn’t occur to them the process of writing was continual. It’s not about one book, it’s a journey of many, many books (hopefully, anyway!).
I always equate it with finding a life partner. It took what (and who!) it took for me to meet my husband. But I never, NEVER doubted I would find him. Publication is no different. And you’re so right in saying that there is a precious element of perceived control in the advice of “Work harder”–because in this business, sometimes it seems the lack of control is hard to bear. Thanks for such a wonderful post!
Erika–YES! The “what’s next” and it’s cousin “what now?” We’re a crazy bunch who just keep on going!
Boy, did I need to hear this. It is exactly what I need to do. I tell my kids about how working hard pays off and slackers never get anywhere. Time for me to walk the walk!
Thanks for giving me a kick in the rear, Nina! I needed it!
The greatest thing about learning to write is seeing how bad our first books were.
“In most cases they were sophomoric crap. The pages bled with extra, unnecessary, and meaningless hyperbole that added a lot of extra words to the otherwise clear narrative and the stellar, brilliant, and profoundly life changing insights on the page were all but, not in a particular way, but in a general way, that is, a way that is neither one way nor the other, but lies somewhere between the two, (but you know what I mean, right?) but/and are unreadable insights,” he said smiling, and smiling again as he smiled at the clarity of his post, reading over it smiling at the sound of his own creative and profoundly, (insert adverb of choice here…then add three more for additional clarity and emphasis…ah heck, add one more to make the point crystal clear) insightful (did I mention he was smiling?) and soothing voice. He smiled and pressed send.
Why do bad writers smile so much…no one else does. 8 )
I like your blog. Happy writing.
So funny and so true! In addition to smiling, my characters have been known to sigh too often as well.
*big sigh* glad I’m not the only one. Bar tender, smiles and sighs for everyone!
Mine tend to smirk or laugh. I just let them through the first draft, and then I tell them to stop being so darn happy and ridiculous during the first couple edits. Glad to know I’m not alone!
thestoriesbegun.wordpress.com
Oh, and I’ve also realized mine sigh a lot. Or “look bored.” AWFUL.
That whole ‘baby thing’ can really throw ya, too, can’t it? And no doubt, the people around us don’t always see the behind the scenes ‘persevering’ that we do. There is a strange, almost irrational faith that lies deep. It’s going to happen for you.
You are right … perseverence pays. If you quit, you’ll never get published.
It’s like when someone asked J.K. Rowling if she thought she got lucky, and she said ‘I don’t believe in luck. I believe in hard work!’
Exactly!
Truer words have rarely been spoken. “I’m no more talented than any of you or anyone else. I just work harder, that’s all.”
Thanks for reminding us all of that, Nina.
Just came over from Janet Reid’s blog. What a great post (and read your link to your first one -what a great husband!)
It took me 16 years, but working harder really does work.
Just came over from your post one Writer Unboxed. Was drawn by your comment there about keeping your blog posts unrestricted to one topic. I teeter on this one as well.
Years ago I attended a writing workshop sponsored by Kenyon College. The teacher was somewhat like yours: arrogant, nastily critical, pompous. He was a real guy’s guy who bonded with the other single males in the class and took particular pleasure in denigrating what he imagined my life was a married woman and mother.
All that negativity just made me dig in and write more, write harder, and better. For myself, not him. On the last day he said that I would get to a place in my writing where I’d want to go to an artists’ colony to write and he’d be happy to recommend me.
Wasn’t sure if he meant it or not and I never asked him when I did reach that stage.
The point your teacher made at the end was the most salient.
The ones who prevail are the ones who don’t give up.
“The Courage to Write” by Ralph Keyes is a wonderful handbook for those moments when you want to throw your pages to the winds.
Thanks for the encouragement. I have always been a high achiever and I found it difficult that there is no test for writing. You can get an A+ from one person and a D from another, but most of the time, there’s no one to grade your work. It’s just you and your laptop. I have an idea for a novel, and it’s just been wafting around for almost a year, but lately I’ve been doing exactly what your husband told you to do. I have been writing, one day I write part of the ending, another the beginning and sometimes I don’t know where what I am writing will fit into my novel- and I am really getting to know my characters. xx
That’s such a good point about the grades! I can relate as a fellow high achiever. It’s very difficult to be involved in an industry that’s so subjective. Keep doing what you’re doing. Sounds like a good plan!
This was the best thing to read this morning. And I really appreciate what you shared about those wise words from your Professor.
Working hard is never easy, but eventually it will pay off. As long as you’re enjoying it and have faith in yourself. Seize the day and persevere.
Tough teacher. I don’t know that I would have lasted to the end.
My mom inadvertantly gave me some of the best advice I have heard regarding writing. After reading the first draft of my first, never-will-be-published novel, she said “Well, not bad. Better than some of the trash that I’ve seen published. Ya’ know, just finishing a novel puts you way ahead of most writers…”
Hard work, tenacity. Just finishing the story. Success has many levels and that is the first one.
I am with you! Keep on writing!
I needed to read this today. Thanks.
*fistbump*
Love the fistbump. Seriously–that made me smile.
Me!! I’m with you! I have suspected that all along. . . that one of the main things that separates a successful writer (or successful anything else) is that they DO it. And do it and do it and do it. I needed this reminder today. Thanks.
Wonderful blog, wonderful advice! “I will not quit!” has been my mantra for some time now. Thank you for sharing this!
Taking the time to just write and write until it feels right. What a great tip!
So true. What’s that line Dory says in Finding Nemo. Just keep swimming, just keep swimming. So yeah, just keep writing….
Love it! I can picture that scene in Nemo right now. (Because after many car rides back and forth to Chicago with the kids I’ve seen it 1000 times.)
I don’t believe that talent always rises to the top but I do believe in perseverance.
This is a great post! I have thought about this advice several times already since I read your blog. What a great (and unexpected) turn of events from the instructor of your class!
http://laurenspathtopub.blogspot.com/
Bravo! this was a very encouraging post and really helpful. I feel like everything you described going through is my own experience and while I haven’t given up, I struggle with the question of why.
I really appreciated this post.
Thank you, Nina. I heartily support the message of this post. It is the subject of my blog which addresses the importance of developing a consistent writing practice. As I tell my students, a daily writing practice will not guarantee that you will get published, but not writing regularly will guarantee that you won’t. The one thing that distinguishes published writers from wannabees is not talent, but that they finish their books!! I’m posting this on my blog. http://dailywritingcoach.blogspot.com/
Hi Nina, The reply I would like to send you just happens to be the sentiment that I posted on SheWrites yesterday…
http://www.shewrites.com/profiles/blogs/writing-is-a-thankless-job
Thank you!
Erin
“Writing isn’t about making money, getting famous, getting dates, getting laid, or making friends. In the end, it’s about enriching the lives of those who will read your work, and enriching your own life, as well. It’s about getting up, getting well, and getting over. Getting happy, okay? Getting happy.”
— Stephen King (On Writing)
Nina, I love this post! Here’s something for all of us out there, working harder, and exploring our potential.
Writing is a thankless job. Sure, if you are one of the select few who achieve a certain measure of success, there will be people who thank you for writing. But for the majority, the rest of us, there is no thank you.
When I worked in a corporate job, I received at least ten emails everyday thanking me for doing my job, or complimenting me on how well I did it. As much as I appreciated the recognition, I didn’t exactly need it. I was being paid to do that job.
In my life now, writing full time, I churn out page after page. I work diligently, days, nights, and weekends. Sometimes I isolate myself for days at a time just to focus myself fully on writing, editing, and honing my craft. I expect me, and only me to catch my mistakes. I read my work with a fine tooth comb, which is easier than the greater task, reading my work with an open heart and waiting to feel something I can’t define, but the instinct of whether or not my work has merit.
Every day I go to work and receive at least one rejection letter. Now there is usually an apology in those. “We apologize for the impersonal nature of this email, but…” Yes, I’m sorry too. I know you are a very busy agent, but automated rejection to the query letter I slaved over doesn’t give me the warm fuzzies either.
Furthermore, there is an expectation that I will be grateful for this opportunity to work without pay. And I really am. However, thanking my husband for choosing to take this journey with me, as we both give up my portion of our income to pursue my dream wears on me too.
So for the rest of you out there today, my coworkers in a thankless job; I thank you. From the bottom of my heart, I thank you for continuing to write.
My original post from http://www.shewrites.com/profiles/blogs/writing-is-a-thankless-job
Hi Erin! Welcome to the blog.
Thanks for your thoughts here. I agree it’s a thankless job (for the unpublished) but we have to remember nobody asked us to do it either! I think Stephen King or somebody noted that in a book about writing . . . the idea that you have to really keep that thought in mind when dealing with the non-writing world. We all choose to pursue this . . . those of us determined and crazy enough stick with it.
This is a fabulous post and oh-so-true. It took me four years to find an agent. I can’t tell you how many times I almost gave up completely. There was even a time I considered not writing anymore–that’s how demoralized I felt–but I’ve been writing so long that I couldn’t possibly stop. Now I’m on submissions and nothing is happening! It’s very frustrating but I’ve always believed exactly what you’ve said in this post. I think the process weeds out so many people just because the rejection is so hard and everything takes so darn long! I think the most important thing (for me) is to continue to write. Maybe one day something I write will break through. Until then, I keep plugging along! Also your husband’s advice: Just Start. Fantastic!
I’m rooting for you! I know a few other writers out on submission now after finally landing an agent. It DOES seem there’s anxiety at every step in this “game.” Then there’s reviews, sales . . . OY!! Why do we want to do this again?
This is such good advice. In all arts, talent is just one part of the equation for success. Hard work and perseverance are the most important ingredients. As Heinlein wrote (paraphrasing), most people only talk about writing, but never do. Of those who do write, most people don’t finish what they write. Of those who do finish what they write, most people don’t send their work out to market. Of those who do send their work out to market, most people stop when they receive their first rejection. Even given all that, there are still thousands and thousands of writers who do write, finish, send out and keep sending out their work. It’s daunting… I tend to fall in the “don’t send out to market” category, having only sold a couple of short stories to ezines for very little money. Have yet to submit a novel query despite having several novels. I think it’s fear of failure — if I keep polishing my novel, I have an excuse for not getting published.
Such a great comment, thank you for sharing that paraphrased quote. As for sending out your work and fearing failure . . . I hear you–that’s a real thing. But maybe part of you knows it’s not truly ready? I think most people send things out too early. I know I have!
I hate writing. I love having written. who said that?
Dorothy Parker said “I hate writing. I love having written.”
Hi – I’m new to your blog and I just wanted to say thank you for the great post. So well put and just what I needed to hear! For me the confidence-lows are the worst for hindering my writing drive – the ideas are still there but it’s hard to find the drive or self-belief to get them down! So far, my technique is to just ride out the lows and catch-up when I’m lucky enough to be on a roll! Oh and try not to panic when I realise that the school summer vacation begins in less than TWO MONTHS (!) and the house will be full of children bombing around again – eek!
I’m so glad you found me! Will check out your blog asap!
Hi Nina,
Another Norman Newguy. I couldn’t help but buzz in, even though the last post was a week or so ago. I began taking my own writing seriously about five or six years ago, and I am now nearly 67 years old (and going strong). I began with a nonfiction book on the military (I am retired US Army and a retired high school teacher), and I really thought that it would be snatched up and sell like hotcakes. After trying for over two years to find an agent or publisher for that one, I, with encouragement from others, decided that a memoir would be easier to sell. I finished that project, and have been going the query route for six or eight months now. I have had very few significant bites at that hook so far. In the interim, I began a humor book and am 30,000 or so words into that. More recently I have begun a novel. I figure that I am going to live to be at least 106 years old, and I am reconsidering, thinking maybe 110. That merely means that I still have forty years of writing left in me. I may just make it in those few years. Wish me luck. I am by no means finished with my efforts. Write on all! John
John, thanks so much for chiming in. You will NOT be 110. Look at how much you’ve written in 5-6 years! Some people spend ten years writing those first 10,000 words. I think you’ll make it.
Thanks for your comments, Nina. I have a few fleeting moments of doubt now and then, but my attitude is generally quite positive, and I am usually on a high throttles setting. I am either writing, revising/rewriting, creating new ideas for my new novel project, or reading guidance from other authors or agents who have already experienced success. I stay busy. I neglected to mention querying, and that continues, of course.
Thanks for this post! Sometimes we forget how much hard work counts in the writing game. You hear stories about Rowling and other writers that make it big on their first novel, with no prior experience. But, she is definitely an outlier. The rest of us have to work–and work hard! Good luck and keep writing!
Ah, but don’t forget JK had been writing since she was a kid. She wrote several books before Harry and collected MANY rejections before landing a deal. There’s definitely no such thing as an overnight success. Scary but also liberating. Good luck!
The amazing thing is that, unlike actors, singers, or athletes, an author’s potential actually grows with age. With time, one can sharpen the mind and gain life experience to enhance the writing one shows to the world. Keep going!
That is so true! I never thought about it like that. No need for Botox when you’re a writer.
Working harder is defiantly on my to-do list, as is learning to spell, or put a coherent sentence together. Unfortunately I’m blessed with something i like to call bone idle laziness. The greats didn’t have to worry about all this spelling or whether their grammar worked correctly.
My favourite part of writing is seeing a story come together, I hate editing! I suppose that’s where I could Work harder.
I’m currently working on my very own novel project (currently still unpublished, just waiting for that one story that doesn’t suddenly start to suck or become a chore to write), I would mention the title but as of now there isn’t anything beyond “The Tales of Watcher, World & Dreams”.
I do believe writing is something everyone can do; all you need is the inspiration of something to write about along with a drive to tell your tale.
That is really good advice though I’m going to commit that to memory.
Thank you ^-^
:wayne
Good post. Reminds me of an interview I read long ago (in high school I think) with Woody Allen. And though everyone thinks of him as a director, he said he is a writer. And I remember he said that even if he’d never sold anything, if he was working as a postman he’d come home after work and write, because that’s what he is: a writer.
And I remember thinking, I’ll never be like that. But now I get it.
As someone else said: writers write.
That’s really what makes the difference. It’s also kinda nice that you had to put up with so much to get that one little gem – kinda like in a story.